You know those moments when you have so much on your mind, when you have so much you'd like to say that all you can do is keep quiet?  

That's been me this week.  I've been soaking it in, reality checking, and just enjoying being on vacation.  Myles is on his first away from family, away from home, sleep away.  He was invited up to Maine by one of our friends, and his, and there was no other answer but yes.  He'll be gone for five whole nights.  In the meantime, Fiona and I feel like we are skippin' town, with no plan to speak of -two nights with my mother's youngest sister near Portsmouth, and now we are in Cambridge crashing with my own sister. I said to Fiona tonight, "Its nice to have some time together, just you and me." Her response was, "Does that mean you don't miss Myles? Does that mean, when I am away, you dont miss me?" Hmmm...I thought, we have quite the row to hoe. Fiona thinks really hard about things, and the implications of things. I told her that I do miss Myles, but that I am happy for him.  I told her that many things can be true at the same time.  I hope she heard me. I know that line of thinking, (the apple doesn't fall far from the tree) and it really isn't helpful sometimes, however thorough it may be. We have since addressed the phenomenon that is Frozen. I could sense she was feeling lonely -being one of the last remaining five year olds that hadn't seen it. Her friends on the playground were singing along and she was trying to catch the drift of the story though osmosis. Last night we watched it, #nobigdeal, and I am glad she can now participate in modern day conversations, but it was a bit depressing watching the animated definition "letting go."  It appears that letting go means changing into a tight strapless dress, adding extra make-up, poofing your hair, and throwing off warm layers. More on that later...

After I handed off Myles I went to Portsmouth by myself in a mild state of shock, coming to grips with my new state of separation, and I ran straight to Bliss. It was full of spring and beauty, and I could have browsed there for hours. I really tried not to try on everything in the store, but I fell under the spell of CP SHADES. The clothes are luxuriously flattering for every age and every woman and I love that.  They are made in California from hand cut fabrics.  You certainly are paying for that sort of quality, but you know that if ever a piece were to make it into your closet, you would be friends forever. It would be your marathon fashion piece, instead of your fifty yard dash fling. 

So here we are: halfway through vacation week in a surreal frame of mind, kind of waiting for the ball to drop, but trying to be present. Tomorrow has a trip in store to our old library, with Fiona and my nieces in tow. We have a few old friends to find. 


Sunday Stroll

Strolling through old haunts. 
Families side by side. 
Slice of this and Scoop of that.
Books found. 
On a whim.
And fifty matzo balls that made it all possible.

Blessings to you all this week, of all weeks. 


Back in the Saddle

Grammie moved out on Tuesday. Things around the house feel very changed.  And quiet. Certainly quiet good. But, as Fiona said, I think of her when I see the empty seat. 

So, today we had a home day.  Without an onlooker one feels free to do whatever the heck one wants. Yell. Eat in-between meals. Leave the dishes in the sink. Skip school.  All around unfiltered living.  

We biked to the lighthouse for the first time this season. Myles was worried about frostbite on his legs, (eight year old boys have a crazy thing for shorts apparently) but it was still worth it.  Its so little and quaint and stone. I love this little lighthouse. And with the pain of winter fading away, it felt like seeing a friend you had forgotten you had.  To the lighthouse, and beyond.


Around Here

My childhood copy of The Little Princess had been resting on my sister's bookshelf for years, and last week we were reunited.  It has been our read-a-loud for the ides of March, and is whisking us all away to imagine what it would be like to live imprisoned in the Bastille.  It is a truly wonderful escape.

In other news I have been trying my hand at knocking off some of the best boy shorts on the market: The mini boden board shorts. I picked up a pair, second hand several years ago, and Myles wore them non-stop for two entire summers.  They didn't survive autumn, and when I went to order them recently, I just couldn't stomach the price tag.  Who knows if it will work, but I just snuck them up into his drawer and am hoping for the best. My pattern is from here: DanaMadeIt. And you can barely tell the airplanes are upside down. Whoops.